Thou shall be able to eat the burger with one hand
"I like lettuce on a burger, maybe even a tomato is nice," Bourdain says. "But it makes it more structurally difficult to eat."
Is the trade-off worth it? Well, in Bourdain's perfect culinary world, you should be able to eat a burger "with one hand," no exceptions. The "commuting cheeseburger" needs to become a thing, right?