Few questions in American society are met with a resounding "yes" more often than "Would you like fries with that?" Partly because we have serious self-control issues, but also because fries are amazing. While they're perceived as a sandwich sidekick, they're often the chief substance a lonely soul idling through a fast-food drive-thru is craving.
I've eaten many a fast-food fry in my day. In fact, people are constantly coming up to me and asking, "Matt, which fast-food chain makes the best fries?" Fine, no one has ever asked me that. But I will nevertheless answer the question.
A few ground rules. This is a discussion of potatoes, not condiments. A place might do some amazing chili-cheese fries but that's for another day that involves more Tums. Also, to be considered, a chain has to have either a national reach, or have developed a robust enough regional following to merit discussion. And for me to have eaten them. On with the rankings!