Just before the climax of the seminal 1989 holiday classic, National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, Clark W. Griswold receives a "Jelly of the Month" subscription in lieu of a bonus from his place of employment. He promptly has a nuclear meltdown filled with more cusses than a Tarantino-helmed Marshall Mathers retrospective. Bottom line: He was pissed.
I apologize if that spoiled the movie for you (seriously, it's been out for three decades, and I'm pretty sure TBS loops it non-stop from mid-October 'til MLK Day, so that's on you). But there's a point here: In the past 30 years, food subscription boxes and subscription "of-the-month" clubs have gone from a low-hanging punchline to one of the most efficient and enjoyable ways to dive head-first into your favorite snacks, sauces, coffee, beer, wine, and booze. They also make ideal holiday gifts, as they can be ordered last minute and force your recipient to actually think about you every month. Plus, it's always fun to get stuff in the mail.
If the US Postal Service is indeed in hospice care, let's at least enjoy its dying gasp with some homemade gin and banana Nutella cookies, OK? Here are the best food and drink subscription boxes this holiday season.