The mystery of the meatless turkey
"There are no dumb questions! But we did get a call once from a woman who was convinced there was no meat on the turkey. She said it was flat and there was no meat. After some probing, we realized the turkey was upside down. It was on its breast, right-side up, and of course there's not going to be much turkey meat on that side. When she flipped it over, she was very happy to see all the meat."
It's OK to come out of the closet
"I like hearing from the first-time cooks. A newlywed called in and was whispering real quiet. I could hardly hear her. I found out she was hiding in a closet upstairs, and she didn't want her in-laws to know she'd never prepared a turkey. She was so nervous she wasn't going to prepare it correctly. We walked her through it, and by the end she was talking loudly, feeling confident, and ready to go.
On the flip side, I had a mother-in-law call from the closet whispering because she was nervous her new daughter-in-law was cooking the turkey incorrectly. She was convinced she didn't know how to cook and wanted to go down there and help her out. But it turns out the daughter-in-law was right."