The brisket: 7lbs, hopefully of very low quality
Celebrating Mexico, Texas, and the Final Four, Conan stuffed a donkey piñata full of what we can only hope was not very good brisket, then shot it via a catapult reportedly borrowed from Mark Cuban's bedroom into a basketball hoop, proving that although white men might not be able to jump, they do know how to operate heavy machinery.
Dan Gentile is a staff writer on Thrillist's National Food and Drink team. He pledges allegiance to the brisket, of the United States of Texas. Follow him to a pound of moist meat at @Dannosphere.