You can take your laptop into the bathroom
You don’t have a desktop computer. Your computer will fit into your bag, and you can take your bag into the bathroom! Here’s something you might not know: you won’t be giving up your seat. You can leave your coat on the chair and no one will sit there! And since I’m pretty sure I saw that coat on sale at H&M for $4.99, there is nothing else at your table of value. Wait, I stand corrected. Your mocha latte is worth more than your coat.
I am not fighting for your laptop
I’m not risking my life for the computer you’re going to scrap in two years anyway. If someone took the very computer on which I’m writing this opinion piece off this table in the coffee shop, would I chase them out the door? This is my work computer, what do you think? Oh no, all the Excel files I’d miss!