I couldn’t help but notice you eating that sushi. Never mind the fact that you're not supposed to eat it that way. I’m more interested in that green sphere next to your ginger. Wasabi is great, right? The burn in your mouth when it hits your tongue. The way it makes your eyes water. The fact that you're not actually eating wasabi at all.
I know, I know -- it’s probably a shock the $8.99 lunch special which includes miso soup, edamame, and hot sake doesn't also just dole out a some finely grated wasabi, but the fact is, almost all sushi restaurants except the most upscale don’t automatically offer up real wasabi with your sushi, and there's a pretty good chance you've actually never had real wasabi in your life. In fact, a few years ago The Washington Post reported that around 95% of wasabi served in restaurants is not real. But don't fret! You may have actually eaten real wasabi, especially if:
1) You've been to a crazy-nice sushi restaurant with prices that make you slightly uncomfortable and nervous
2) You've been to a pretty damn nice sushi restaurant and you've ordered the omakase, or a lot of sashimi
3) You've noticed that the wasabi at your table is light green with a grated texture, and a more herbal, grassy, slower burn
4) The restaurant had the option of a different wasabi on the menu for a dollar or two more
5) After 20 minutes, your wasabi wasn't nearly as powerful as it was when you first got your plate
6) You unintentionally befriended a wasabi root salesman named Ted while waiting for your table and Ted saw a little bit of his impetuous, sassy, and sweaty younger self in you, so before he left he winked at the server, slipped him a $10, and told him, “Put the real stuff on my buddy’s plate, OK?"