What it is: hazelnuts + chocolate + sugar
Who makes a fancy version: Askinosie Chocolate
How much it costs: $13 per 6.5 oz jar
What?! Why? We're such big fans of Nutella here that we figured out ways to combine it with booze. But this spread takes hazelnut spread to the next level, making it from scratch and sourcing hazelnuts from an orchard in Washington. Yeah, it's a few more bucks than Nutella, but if the worst thing about artisanal foods is that it brings more fancy chocolate spread into the world, then I'm okay with it.
What it is: oil and eggs
Who makes a fancy version: Empire Mayonnaise Co.
How much it costs: $8 per 4oz jar
What?! Why? While you can get a jar of Empire's plain mayo for $5, the real value is in the more expensive jars of white truffle, bacon, red chili, and black garlic varieties. Their entire business model has been parodied on SNL, which is a good sign their product is reaching critical mass. They could be the mayo version of Sam Smith, who no one knew before he was an SNL musical guest, and now everyone's mom makes egg salad sandwiches with him.
What it is: NaCl
Who makes a fancy version: Artisan Salt Company
How much it costs: $14.99 for 6.5oz
What?! Why? The place where you get your sea salt from can effect the taste of said salt. You have the option of getting it from the Mediterranean, Hawaii, France or India. It's important to have sea salt that's more well-traveled than you are, or else why even use salt?
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Lee Breslouer is a senior writer for Thrillist, and thinks expensive things taste better. Follow him to falsehoods: @LeeBreslouer.