There are three ways to approach expired food: with caution and trepidation, say “fuck it” and eat it anyway, or say “aw hell no,” and toss your graham crackers out the window as soon as they are within 48 hours of the date stamped on the box.
Almost 90% of Americans will throw away perfectly safe and edible food the day it hits its “expiration date.” I used to be part of that percentage. I believed that if I consumed a food past its date, I would surely contract an unprecedented hybrid of smallpox, herpes, lupus, and E. coli, turning me into a bed-ridden, fly-covered zombie, which would thoroughly ruin all weekend plans. These dates are held as sacrosanct, but in many respects, that sentiment is just plain wrong.
Basically, I'm Morpheus, and I'm telling you your entire consuming life has been one big fat sham. This article is your red pill for food-based enlightenment. Take it.