Sorry, stuffed crust, but your day has passed. Very soon, we'll have a Little Caesars pretzel pizza and right this second, we can enjoy a pie with an all-French fry base, thanks to the genius at Foodinese. May you enjoy eternal cheesy slumber, old friend.
The secret to making an effective French fry pie, as Foodinese explains, is to hold the stuff together with a melted mozzarella glue. Once you've assembled your fries at the bottom of a pizza pan or 12in skillet, you're going to generously coat them in the shredded cheese and melt it all in your oven. Then smother the stuff in tomato sauce and even more mozz (plus pepperonis, if you like) before baking your finished French fry pie at 400°F. As the chef points out, this pizza is even gluten-free, so great news for everyone feigning an allergy. Or, you know, people who are actually gluten-intolerant.
Kristin Hunt is a food/drink staff writer for Thrillist, and will be conducting important experimental work on curly fry pizza for the next few days. Follow her to the lab results at @kristin_hunt.