Food & Drink

Behold the world's greatest Gardetto's/ Munchies/ Chex/ etc. hybrid snack mix

Published On 09/28/2013 Published On 09/28/2013
thrillist snack mix

Snack mixes are among the best salty bar nibbles out there, but they're far from perfect. Some have too many pretzels. Some have a startling lack of cheese. Others don't even have nuts! NO NUTS!!! To solve this, we braved the wilds of a grocery store to score all the mass-produced mixes we could, and then we sorted through them, pulling out the best bits and combining them into the world's greatest snack mix. And then we ate it. And then we still ate the leftovers, but we weren't really that psyched about it.

Mixed Nuts with Sesame Sticks
What You're Taking: All nut mixes are different, but all sesame stick mixes'll have the sticks, peanuts, and cashews. You want these. Screw walnuts! After you separate out the good stuff, it's imperative that they go into the bottom of the bowl so the oil causes the nuts to get coated with all the salt, garlic, and cheese that shakes off the mix.

The good folks at Frito-Lay, having realized that it's impossible to choose just one of their signature chips, just chucked them all into a bag (but, sadly, no Fritos... perhaps the Bandito is on the loose) and gave the mix a name to appeal to those most likely to eat it. For the super-mix, pick out the Cheetos and the Rold Golds, which're dusted with Cheeto and Dorito cheese. Since these'll be bigger than everything else, smash them in your hand before adding them.

Cheddar Chex Mix
You can't make a snack mix without the OG of the family, so snag a bag of Chex Mix and just take out the Chex. You can get any flavor, but the cheese is the best because all that weird artificial fromage manages to infiltrate the cracks of the semi-sweet cereal, making for dense hunks of deliciousness that eliminate all nutritional value from this part of your balanced breakfast.

Perhaps the best snack mix ever known to man. Until this one. You're definitely gonna want to add the signature rye chips and the little breadsticks to the mix (fun fact: the mix came to be as an excuse to use the ends they snipped off larger breadsticks). You could take the pretzels if you really want, but the garlic salt might overwhelm the cheese. And the cheese must stand alone.

Cheez-It Snack Mix
Cheez-It makes a hell of a snack mix, but they're kinda slippery because they totally screw you on the best, most unique ingredient: the greasy little white rice puffs. My box only had 10... so to get enough for your mix, you'll need at least 5 boxes. Then just one handful of Cheez-Its. Jerks.

Dump it all in a bag and shake it like your over-indulging aunt at a wedding. This'll get all the seasonings mixed together.

The Masterpiece
Voila! The cheesiest, garlic-iest, saltiest snack mix ever, with all the perfect components ready to shovel into your face.