You'll also be required to join the union alongside your fellow Placers, with whom you'll no doubt banter gleefully in the break room over free Lunchables, enjoying the fruits (or meats?) of your placement labor as you collectively assemble your piteous feasts.
Sure, your childhood dream job turned out to be just another job in the manufacturing industry, but who cares? You can apply for the position here, provided you're planning on relocating to Avon, NY for the privilege -- which, of course you are.
Gianni Jaccoma is a staff writer for Thrillist, and he never got Lunchables as a kid. Follow his sodium-deprived tweets @gjaccoma, and send your news tips to email@example.com