What they say: A juicy 100% beef patty simply seasoned with a pinch of salt and pepper, melty American cheese, tangy pickles, minced onions, ketchup and mustard.
What I say: My order at McDonald's, starting in high school, always consisted of two cheeseburgers, and then whatever I was going to actually get to eat as my meal. The cheeseburger is such a vital part of the experience, and, one of the key elements, aside from a lack of bacon and tomato, is the minced onion, which gives a little bite and spice along with the pickles and other condiments. It’s enough to make me actually learn how to mince.
1. Big Mac
What they say: A double layer of sear-sizzled 100% pure beef mingled with special sauce on a sesame seed bun and topped with melty American cheese, crisp lettuce, minced onions and tangy pickles.
What I say: Here’s a serious question, brought up to me during this tasting by our senior editor Matt Lynch. Why is there no such thing as the Little Mac, which would include the same toppings as the Big Mac, but just get rid of the middle bread and second patty, and pay tribute to the tiny boxer who is extremely good at punching King Hippo in his belly button? I would buy that burger at least 30 times a year, and rally my family to serve them on Thanksgiving. But anyway, after a long tasting, I was relieved to see that I still love this thing as much as I do. My favorite fun fact about it is that its original name, the Aristocrat, failed as hard as you might expect, but the actual build of the burger -- burned into my skull by commercials from the '80s -- is a thing of beauty. And now they even sell the damn sauce. Win-win.