Oreo has a propensity to churn out a kaleidoscope of new -- often super-weird -- flavors regularly, like Swedish Fish, banana split, even cookies and cream (basically an Oreo-flavored Oreo).
In spite of all its efforts to create something new and exciting, I'd usually just rather eat a regular Oreo. But then I got the hot-off-the-assembly-line collaboration with German chocolate maestro Milka, and now my entire life's trajectory has been thrown off axis. This may be the single best thing Oreo has ever produced. And remember, these are the people who gave us the dearly departed Oreo O's.
These cookie-heavy chocolate bars made their rounds across Europe last year -- to obvious success. And now they are coming stateside because Oreo is banking that Americans will be into an inside-out Oreo stuffed into a chunk of German chocolate (yes, I'd take that bet, too).
The bars are available in two varieties: the regular version that features a milk chocolate bar filled with vanilla creme and chunks of the cookie, and the Big Crunch Bar, which weighs in at a hefty 10.5oz (or three times the size of a regular bar) and contains an entire layer of Oreo cookies inside.
The bars are currently available in limited areas, with full-blown national distribution coming in January 2017 -- just in time to help you break your New Year's resolutions!
If you simply can't wait till 2017, write your local congressman and demand your county gets some early. They can't possibly be too busy right now.
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Wil Fulton is a staff writer for Thrillist. He's never once peed on a busboy, but once he threw up on a horse. Follow him @wilfulton.