1. If your pizza doesn't come in 30 minutes, it's free.
2. You don't (usually) sweat when you eat.
3. Paying for food is not only acceptable, it's polite.
4. Going to dinner with your best friend won't ruin your relationship.
5. A food baby goes away after a few hours, so you won't have to support it for 18 years.
6. The only thing pancakes cling to is your stomach lining.
7. If your grandma passed down a handwritten book of sex positions, it would be super weird.
8. No one cries after ravioli, I mean, probably.
9. You don't have to get naked to eat (you totally can, though).
10. You can't invite your family over for a nice Sunday orgy .