"Me: 'And you don't want anything on it, right? Just a plain pizza.'
"Me: 'OK, great.'
"Customer: 'That comes with sausage on it, right?' -- Penny Taylor
Well, that's a new one
"I run a small cafeteria-style restaurant in an extremely small, rural town.
"I was walking around the dining room checking on the customers. I asked a table of two women how their meals were. The first said hers was great. The second complained that our beef tips had 'too much flavor.'
"I told her that I didn't know what I could do about that." -- Alan Terry
"Many moons ago, there was a Subway sandwich shop in Downtown Hershey, PA. I worked there.
"Like all locations, we had our regulars, and we also had a lot of guys working various construction jobs that would come through on the main drag. They'd be chugging to work, see us open -- one of the few things open that early on that end of town -- hop in, get lunch, and we'd never see them again. This was one of those guys, I think.
"He came in, scruffy-looking and overalls, and immediately launched into a tirade that his sandwich was always soggy when he got it out for lunch, and he doesn't want no more soggy sandwiches, thankyouverymuch! My co-worker and I looked at each other, mentally scrolling through what would make our sandwiches as soggy as he was claiming, and we assured him that we'd make sure his sandwich wasn't dripping.