"So I start explaining, 'Poaching is a way of cooking eggs where they crack the egg into hot water...'
"The mother interrupts, 'She KNOWS what a poached egg is. Why does it say DUCK EGG?'
"At a loss, I say, 'Because it's a... duck... egg?' Their sons burst out laughing while I struggle to keep a straight face. This woman didn't know that ducks lay eggs." -- Janie Stone
Just a plain pizza, please
"When I was working as a hostess/phone operator at a Giordano’s in Chicago, the most common pizza order went like this:
"Customer: 'I'd like a medium, regular pizza.'
"Me: 'OK, so one medium-sized, plain cheese pizza.'
"Me: 'And you don't want anything on it, right? Just a plain pizza.'
"Me: 'OK, great.'
"Customer: 'That comes with sausage on it, right?' -- Penny Taylor