Food & Drink

Papa John Insured His Hands for $15 Million

Heidi Klum's legs... Jennifer Lopez's butt... Papa John's hands. What do these things all have in common, other than they were staples of your 2002 TV viewing? 

They're all insured for millions of dollars.

Yes, John "Papa John" Schnatter, the red-shirted pizza CEO, just took out a huge insurance policy for his dough-tossing hands, and they’re worth a slice-dropping $15.4 million (£10 million). That comes out to about $1.5 million per finger, or 1 million large pepperoni pizzas.

The custom-made policy is insured by Lloyd’s of London, and covers the 'za czar should anything happen to his precious paws, according to a statement from Papa John's. The company said John's "pizza maker's touch" is the key ingredient in the pizza chain's success, one of the world's largest. And all this time we thought it was the garlic sauce and the pepperoncini in the box.

But wait, the multimillion dollar-hands story gets weirder.

Not only did Papa John's insure its founder's mitts, it also called in Amy Garner, described as "one of the UK’s leading Palmist," to provide an expert appraisal of the prized hands. Needless to say, she offered odd details via Papa John's press release:

1. â€śPapa John has a rich imagination – this is demonstrated by his headline – the space between the thumb and index finger. This is ideal for creating eye-catching pizza toppings and delicious recipes, essential in the business of making and selling pizzas.”

2. â€śFurthermore, Papa John’s right index finger is longer than his ring finger, highlighting his ambition and vision which are both key to an expanding business. These qualities have enabled Papa John to take his small business of selling pizzas from the back of his father’s tavern and turn it into to a global pizza success. The presence of his Apollo lines demonstrates that Papa John is in alignment with his soul purpose – meaning he really was born to make pizzas.”

Well, now you know way more about this dude's hands than you ever wanted to know. But it's those very hands that've brought countless pies to couch potatoes and college students everywhere -- so maybe they're worth something after all.

Just not $15 million.

Tony Merevick is Cities News Editor at Thrillist and wonders what part of his body he should insure -- any suggestions? Send news tips to news@thrillist.com and follow him on Twitter @tonymerevick.