Pizza Delivery Drivers' Unbelievable True Stories

Pizza delivery guys (and gals) never know what they'll see when jumping in their car at the beginning of a shift -- will it be a huge tip from a benevolent millionaire, a customer who demands to kiss them, or a kid whose brain is exploding? Our nation's finest delivery folks have stories to tell, and many of them head to Reddit's endlessly entertaining /r/TalesFromThePizzaGuy. We've compiled some of the best stories they've ever told, most of which will make you glad you have a job that doesn't require you to deliver pizza.

Nudity is free, and there's a tip, too

pizza story on Reddit
Reddit
pizza boxes
Flickr/Eric Kilby

Fake cash, real sadness

That old, weird, half-naked guy looks familiar

pizza story on Reddit
Reddit

The pizza guy finally gets his revenge!

Free pizza is a crime

Sometimes the pizza delivery girl is just a pizza delivery girl

pizza story on Reddit
Reddit

In which the brain of a young child is forever changed

pizza story on Reddit
Reddit

Talk about a bunch of working stiffs

pizza story on Reddit
Reddit

These guys deliver in rain, shine, sleet, snow, and blood

pizza story on Reddit
Reddit

I'm not about to cry, you're about to cry

pizza story on Reddit
Reddit
braces
Flickr/Lucas McDaniel

It's a shame orthodontists don't deliver

I only eat at pizza places with a greenhouse in the back

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Lee Breslouer is a senior writer for Thrillist, and is appreciative for the existence of pizza deliverypeople. Follow him to hot pizza: @LeeBreslouer.