Chicken & Waffles
Ooo, look at the cute little waffle and fried chicken shapes in the cereal! Once again, this is a base of Honey Bunches of Oats with two additional cereal pieces. And just as I couldn’t smell bacon in the Maple Bacon Donuts cereal, this doesn’t smell anything like chicken (it’s also completely free of actual chickens). But I’ll admit that the ingredients in this cereal are getting me hyped: onion powder, garlic powder, and a spice blend with black pepper, marjoram, sage, and thyme. That gives me the impression that Post committed to making this cereal taste like chicken and waffles as much as possible. The last guy I saw get upset from a lack of commitment was Colton on The Bachelor, and if this doesn’t taste like chicken or waffles, I’m also going to freak out and jump over a fence.
One bite was all it took to be impressed. Post did not tone down the onion and garlic flavors up front. Thankfully the savory flavors didn’t linger, and the finish reminded me plenty of a waffle, along with some familiar buttery, maple syrup notes that I’m guessing was also in the Maple Bacon Donuts. My brain is confused as to how the cereal-makers were able to make a cereal taste this complex. Ah, the magic of artificial flavoring!
Here’s the bad news: This cereal does not taste like chicken. Despite the cereal’s onion powder, garlic powder, and spice blend, eating this doesn’t make me think I’m eating chicken. Instead, it tastes like the flavor of chicken once removed, like I’m somehow eating a memory of a time I ate chicken. (That sentence was directed by Christopher Nolan.) Suffice it to say, if you eat this while you think hard enough about eating chicken and waffles, maybe you’ll be convinced. Here’s the good news: It does tastes like waffles! Hmm, I wonder if this would taste more like chicken and waffles if I threw some shredded chicken in the bowl.
On second thought, maybe the next time I’m in the mood for a sugary cereal, I’ll just stick to Honeycomb.