1. The main concern is catching you, not helping you
"There was one guy that used to say: 'I’m Joey Crawford and you’re Pat Riley, let’s do this.'”
2. They decide your score, then make the points work
“Sometimes they cite things they aren't required to, then there are things that they absolutely are supposed to cite but don't. It's more like, 'This looks like a 93, three points off here, four there, done.'"
3. If they're having a bad day, you're screwed
“On the chance that you catch a health inspector on a bad day, you could be in for a world of hurt. It's just about the most power you can witness someone holding over someone else.”
4. Every one has different standards
“Some will swear up and down that A, B, and C are the most important things to stay on top of, and on the next inspection, the inspector doesn't even look at A, B, or C. Instead they swear it's all about X, Y, and Z, and you're back to square one.”