“I have a go-to lie I tell,” B.W. says. “I say I had this dream: we’re in a restaurant and I smacked my girl on her ass or something, and she punches me and I go face-first into the dessert cart. I roll down the aisle in front of these business ladies who have real short skirts on, and I look up at them and my face is all covered and they start giggling at me. But then the girl [who punched me] just rolls me back to the table and keeps eating while I’m unconscious in a cake at the table.
“If a girl is really shocked by that, then I know not to say anything more," B.W. says. "But if they say, ‘That’s pretty funny, I could see myself doing something like that,’ then I’m like: okay, alright.”
“I’ve had some difficulties finding someone who’ll try it,” says a man who goes by MessyMadMan on the fetish website FetLife.com. MessyMadMan gets turned on by taking a pie to the face, like B.W., but he also likes wet and messy sex, which people in the know call WAM, splosh, or gunge. He likes to be covered in frosting, mud, custard, or whipped cream. He also likes pre-sex food fights, and being turned into a human birthday cake, which is exactly what it sounds like.