We made sandwiches with peanut butter and 10 random fridge items
So you have a jar of peanut butter, a couple slices of mold-free bread, no jelly, and no will to go to the store to get some. What do you do? You can't just have a peanut butter sandwich with nothing else on it, but with only two pieces of un-gross bread, you can't risk experimenting to see what other random stuff in your fridge will make this experience better. Well, you don’t have to. That’s my job. PB + Random Fridge Stuff: here we come.
PB & Cookie Dough
Don’t act like you’re above buying cookie dough just to eat it raw with a spoon. Do you even own a baking pan? When spread on bread with PB it creates a very sticky, very rich, very sweet dessert sandwich. I kinda wanted to deep-fry the other half of this one. Now I’m just talking dirty. Let’s move on.
PB & Wasabi Paste
This is just cruel. It burns and you can’t even tell you’re eating peanut butter anymore, which is just a sin. It took all my energy not to cry. It’s spicy and sticky. The good thing about wasabi is that the heat fades quickly and you’re not stuck with it burning your tongue for an hour like hot sauce. This is a good dare food, but a disappointing snack.
PB & Cape Cod Chips
Sweet and salty heaven. I feel so narrow-minded only adding chips to my turkey sandwiches all these years. It’s delicious and crunchy and turns a PB sandwich into something worthy of that one movie Jim Breuer did.
PB & Pickled Jalapeños
This one conjured not-so-distant memories of wasabi, but ended up shocking the hell out of me in a good way. I had no idea how nicely the vinegar would compliment the peanut butter. The heat is very subtle. I really, really enjoyed it.
PB & Canned Pumpkin
I know it’s fall and food is deemed unworthy if it’s not pumpkin flavored, but pumpkin straight out of a can tastes like baby food. The peanut butter tries to save it but the pumpkin is just too bland. The texture is really mushy, though it might be better if the pumpkin was heated or spiced with pie flavoring.
PB & Greek Yogurt
Plain Gree-Yo is not my favorite anything. On the sandwich it smells sour, looks clumpy, and made me think of some gross medical condition.
PB & Strawberry Cream Cheese
Strawberry cream cheese is a poser. It tries to be jelly, but it’s just not sweet enough. The creaminess might seem nice at first, but it turns out to be creaminess overkill.
PB & Chocolate Pudding
I really wanted to like it. It seems only natural that chocolate and PB would go together between bread like they do in a Reese’s Peanut Butter cup. But this sandwich makes you realize just how unchocolate those pudding cups really are. PB is the dominant flavor and the whole thing was a slimy mess. If it's chocolate & PB you want, I would try fudge, or Hershey’s syrup instead.
PB & Sprinkles
Sprinkles are really more of an aesthetic food. They don’t make an ice cream cone or a cupcake more delicious, but they sure as hell makes them more fun to eat. This combo totally proves my point. The sprinkles had no discernible flavor. They were a little crunchy, but only 1-bite worth of crunchy. because after that they turn to sugar in your mouth.
PB & Vanilla Ice Cream
Vanilla ice cream was weird on bread, but I liked the taste. Not my favorite combo, but the flavor was good and it was very creamy.
In conclusion, peanut butter is fine on its own, but who wants just 'fine'? If you're taking the time to cook something like a peanut butter sandwich (yes, this constitutes cooking and don't let anyone shame you into thinking you're NOT a chef) then jazz it up a little. If that Peanut Butter & Co. guy can build a business off of endless combos then you have no excuse to let your peanut butter go naked ever again. Just don't clothe it in canned pumpkin.
Mara Montalbano is Thrillist's Official Taste Tester and she has a theory that whenever you eat a plain peanut butter sandwich, Elvis cries. Follow her here.