Taco Bell, we don't quiero you as much as we did a few days ago. For one, you drop two new waffle tacos on the heel of your glorious breakfast waffle taco, but when we went to one of the select Orange County outlets to test them, we were told the Chicken & Waffle Taco was "pulled."* And not even in the way that British people say it... which would mean making out. And on top of that, the Very Berry was a hot mess, as you'll find out from our below 1-to-10 ratings in various very important categories.
Taste-testing Taco Bell's new Very Berry Taco: It's not very berry good
Presentation: 5 -- That’s being generous. Most of the whipped cream had melted into bubbly foam upon contact with the hot waffle. So... more of a deflated air mattress than the “bed” they claim. We even came back later to get another one on the off chance that the poorly constructed first batch was a fluke -- but even ordering extra whipped cream didn’t help much.
Very Berryness: 4 -- We counted less than a dozen berries on each. "Moderately Berry" just doesn't have the same ring.
Handholdability: 8 -- “This thing’s got waffle grips!”
Overall taste: 7 -- Close your eyes. Ignore the bruised flesh-looking guts. With that slightly crispy waffle surrounding it, it still basically tastes like a funnel cake. That state fair-ness is the only thing giving it this 7. They could put a Mounds bar and some seaweed in here and it would basically taste like funnel cake.
Price: 9 -- 79 cents? Deal! You get what you pay for, and it’s certainly edible, which is always a good thing for food to be.
*While we were in there, a customer walked in and tried to order it, commenting, unsolicited, on how fantastic it was the first time. He nearly cried when he was told the damning news.