“They’re a legal mob, except I don’t get a bat to the knees.”
"The blade bounced right off the calamari, and sunk right into my finger."
"Nowhere else save possibly British football matches do people let manners and decorum fly out the window at the first little bump in the road."
"The ****ing heat..."
"I've got a floor fan blowing on a compressor right now because the fridge fan shorted out."
"You hired a chef for a reason. Let me do my job."
"Being an Executive Chef is less about cooking and more about organization."
"I live in Alaska, where 'hippies' have guns and kill their own food. That isn't to say that all vegans/veggies are hippies..."
"Nothing is more annoying than not having the proper amount of staff when we are slammed."
"I guess some people don't realize Lyme disease isn't caused by limes."
“It is nearly impossible for any restaurant that is not McDonald’s or Taco Bell to seat and serve a table in 15-20 minutes."