Many people all over the country stand in somewhat ridiculous lines just to get a piece of the cultish grocery magic TJ’s been offering since 1967. But did you know that your Trader Joe’s grocery items actually tell so much about you and your hopes and dreams and T-shirts? Well, luckily for you, I did:
Chili Lime Chicken Burgers
You like to go to costume shops and buy kooky, alarmingly expensive costumes and call out “impromptu dress-up party!” as you walk into random bars just to change things up. You’re known as a “one-man party” at work and are always down for “beer o’clock” or “beer-thirty” or “drinking during lunch”. You don’t have a lot of people’s personal cell phone numbers.
Speculoos Cookie Butter
There was a time during the mid-aughts when you jogged everyday. You sometimes look back at that time and think that you wouldn’t even recognize that person, before settling back onto your beanbag to watch another Love It or List It with the Canadian Bachelorette girl while spreading crushed cookie spread on your cookies.