The Free-Sample Savant
Like a hummingbird, he flits from stand to stand, gathering up a chunk of Jarlsberg here, a dab of red-pepper hummus there. He's been known to assemble entire meals this way. Similar to Phone Talker, he often has no intention of purchasing anything.
The Evangelical Vegetarian
She loves Beyond Meat's Beefy Crumbles so hard, she got their logo tattooed on her foot. MorningStar bacon is OK, Quorn meatballs, sure. She tells you all this by the hemp soap. Most of these have to do with "more energy," which she evidently uses to seek new converts.
The Crunchiest Girl You've Ever Seen
It doesn't matter where you are, or what time of year it is -- if you set foot inside a Whole Foods, you'll see her. Sometimes she'll be wearing her Oberlin hoodie; other times, tights with paint stains on the butt. Her cart is full of infinity kale, her hobo bag contains an iPhone 3s, Burt's Bees, and Birkenstocks (she enjoys shopping barefoot). It's entirely possible you are in love with her.