Deep-dish pies and deep Portland beers

This pizza place does the impossible: managing to be deliciously "Chicago-inspired" without the help of that delightful Peter Cetera. Instead, they serve the area's only deep-dish pies, all packed with so much spicy goodness, now might be a good time to invest in Pepto stock.

Be still your heart (soon enough!). These cornmeal-y monsters pack toppings like hunks of spicy sausage the size of golf balls, gigantic pepperoni slices, prosciutto, and meatballs.

You can cop solo slices of any pie, from Artichoke & Parmesan to this Meaty w/ giardiniera peppers

This gravy-soaked Italian beef sandwich (w/ hot peppers) kicks off the non-pie Windy City favorites, which also include paninis and "pizza dogs", which are either wieners dressed up with pizza toppings, or a type of canine bred for generations by Louie Anderson

This cannoli is made to order and comes sprinkled with chocolate pistachios. Well, this one isn't made to order. In fact, it's probably been eaten by now. But you get the idea.

There's a full bar and a rack of taps that includes Chi-Town favorite Goose Island, and the fridge is stocked with sixers and boomers of Bear Republic Racer 5, Double Mountain Vaporizer, et Cetera.