Two important facts you probably weren't aware of: 1) A pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes , and 2) December 21st is the longest night of the year (we're talking 15hrs of straight darkness), a perfect chance to celebrate what should be the "Best Night of Your Life", assuming you spend it hitting the city's best Thrillist-approved cocktail bars, nightclubs, and dives 'til the sun pops back up.

Check out our picks for Seattle's best party dinner spots below, and make sure to fully map out a perfect evening with our itinerary builder.

Maneki
International District
It's been in business over 100yrs and it's still almost impossible to get a table at this ID mainstay that's all but frozen in the '60s -- a particularly sweet version of said decade where they make seriously next-level eel or salmon skin maki, and gargantuan slices nigiri sushi at the tiny sushi bar in back, and turn-out way-better-than-they-sound Asian oddities like octopus-stuffed donut holes.

Bastille

Bastille
Ballard
This sprawling Old Ballard French-taurant (it's got two bars, a huge covered patio, etc.) specializes in classic bistro fare (Kennebec potato fries w/ truffle aioli, steak frites, etc.), and libations prepped by one Seattle's sweetest bartenders, including the Royal Scots Sour, which you make either by ruling the country remotely for 10 years after Balliol’s abdication in 1296, like King Edward I of England, or by combining Scotch, pear eau-de-vie, lemon, mint, egg white & bitters.

Tallulah Anderson

Madison Park Conservatory
Madison Park
Chef'd by the guy behind 2009's uber-popular Tako Truk pop-up, this bi-level eat spot boasts a seasonally/local ingredient driven menu of whatever-style-of-food-they-feel-like-making, served up in a Mediterranean-ish space with a brick-floored downstairs lit by wrought iron fixtures, a laid-back upstairs bar/private dining room decked with vintage Little Tramp art, and an entryway open to the chef's station, which Raekwon specifically requested be Only Built 4 Cuban Linx.

Von Trapp’s
Capitol Hill
If you like beer, or beer-based cocktails, or lawn games, or artisanal housemade sausages, then Von Trapp's -- a massive 420-seat suds hall from the guys behind Poquitos (and Bastille, and Stoneburner, and Macleod's), fitted with two bars, five indoor bocce courts, two elevated mezzanine-style sitting areas, and a "bier den" tricked out like a grandiose Bavarian hunting lodge -- will be like The Sound Of Music to your ears.

Poquitos

Poquitos
Capitol Hill
This 122-seat comida-ry was inspired by a vintage neon "Poquitos" sign salvaged years ago and hung outside, and is rife with south-of-the-border sourced decorative touches (14,000 Talavera tiles from Puebla, giant metal light fixtures/mirrors from Mexico City) that fancify a brick-heavy 3500sqft space boasting arched passageways, an open kitchen with made-to-order tortilla and guac stations, and a fully fireplace'd covered patio. 

Ezell’s Famous Fried Chicken
Central District
Quantity is no problem for this fried chicken spot loved by Oprah Winfrey and hipsters alike. You need two pounds of mashed potatoes to go? Sure, whatever, take three! And don’t forget the chicken strips (spicy of course). Pro-tip: call ahead for fried okra, it takes 10 minutes cause they make it to order but goddamn is it worth the wait. 

Brave Horse Tavern
South Lake Union
This second story, brick- and blonde wood-heavy 200-seater from Tom Douglas, is dominated by a giant three-sided bar that boasts 24 taps, features two retro-style shuffleboard tables beneath massive metal skylights and a ream of decorative touches (vintage bar signs, reclaimed plank walls, equine statues, etc.), and is serving up fancified pub-eats from an open kitchen fronted by an entry-facing to-go counter, also the dude Shawn Kemp hires to tally up his trips to Kidd Valley.

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1. Madison Park Conservatory 1927 43rd Ave E, Seattle, WA 98112 (Madison Park)

The goal at Madison Park Conservatory is to offer a warm, community-style atmosphere in which customers can enjoy its menu of new American cuisine. This is amplified by the fine selection of wines and cocktails available, because, as we all know, alcohol brings everyone closer together. It's scientific fact.

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2. Von Trapp's 912 12th Ave, Seattle, WA 98122 (Capitol Hill)

German resto Von Trapp's three core principles are bocce, brats, and beer. Hit the court and finish off with a hearty chicken wiener schnitzel.

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3. Maneki 304 6th Ave S, Seattle, WA 98104 (Downtown)

Maneki is the last surviving restaurant from Seattle’s once bustling Japantown, so you know they must be doing something right. The family-owned restaurant has established itself as a local favorite. Fun—almost unbelievable—fact: in the 1930s, one of Maneki’s dishwashers was Takeo Miki, who later served as Japan’s prime minister. What’s even more unbelievable is how good Maneki’s sushi is.

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4. Poquitos 1000 E Pike St, Seattle, WA 98122 (Capitol Hill)

This 122-seat comida-ry from the dudes behind Ballard's hyper-successful French spot Bastille was inspired by a vintage neon "Poquitos" sign they salvaged five years ago, and is rife with south-of-the-border dishes.

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5. Ezell's Famous Chicken 501 23rd Ave, Seattle, WA 98122 (Central District)

For over 20 years, Ezell's has been serving up some of Seattle's favorite fried chicken. They've got plenty of locations all over Washington, and cater events, so they can bring their battered-n-fried awesomeness straight to you.

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6. Brave Horse Tavern 310 Terry Ave N, Seattle, WA 98109 (South Lake Union)

Brought to Amazon-land by the same crew behind Cuoco, this second story, brick- and blonde wood-heavy 200-seater is dominated by a giant three-sided bar that boasts 24 taps, and features two retro-style shuffleboard tables beneath massive metal skylights.

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7. Bastille Cafe & Bar 5307 Ballard Ave NW, Seattle, WA 98107 (Ballard)

This Ballard Frenchtaurant's motto is "Damn good French cuisine", so come here to down the likes of gourmet steak frites, moules frites, and lots of good things that don't involve "frites", like the tasty wines by the glass.

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