4. Not everybody "pahks the cah in Hahvahd Yahd"
The oft-imitated, never-quite-duplicated, frequently mutilated Boston accent (cough... Tim Robbins in Mystic River... cough) is only prevalent in certain pockets of town (cough... Southie). Side note: there is no parking in Harvard Yard. Please, just don't say this. Ever.
5. "Wicked pissah" means "really good"
Accents aside, the local lexicon has lots of peppah. If you need a water fountain, ask for a bubbler (or bubblah). We also put jimmies (NOT sprinkles) on our ice cream, and buy booze at a packie.
6. Don’t even bother trying to spell Worcester, or Gloucester, by sounding them out
It won’t end well for anyone.
7. Southie isn’t really like all those Ben Affleck movies starring Casey Affleck
Due to some pretty intense gentrification, some parts of Southie now seem like extensions of the South End. While other parts of Southie are still EXACTLY LIKE THOSE BEN AFFLECK MOVIES STARRING CASEY AFFLECK.
8. Everyone here drives like a Masshole
Have you ever seen a "Massachusetts Left"? You will. Any hesitation AT ALL while driving (or walking, for that matter) gets you an ear full of car horn. Don’t take it personally when Nana flips you the bird.
9. We don’t call it "Beantown" anymore, so neither should you
Why? Because nobody has made or eaten Boston baked beans since FDR was in the White House.