14 things in Chicago we're totally thankful for
This Thanksgiving, before the food, family, and prayers for a Lions/Packers mutual destruction, we take a moment to reflect on 14 things in this city we're actually thankful for.
1. We're thankful for cab drivers, even when they secretly want to run us over for paying with a credit card.
2. We're thankful for Willis Tower, still the tallest building in our hearts... because spires are garbage.
3. We're thankful for Chicago Fire and Chicago PD and their next spin-off series Chicago Streets & Sanitation.
4. We're thankful for Grand Theft Auto V, because it produced THIS.
5. We're thankful for Bad Decision Bars, because shame and alcohol are the common thread binding our city.
6. We're thankful for Ventra, for making double-sure (even triple-sure!) we’re charged for CTA rides.
7. We're thankful for Mayor Rahm Emanuel, who doesn't smoke crack. Or push down old women. Or threaten to rip anyone's "f---ing throat out," not recently anyway.
8. We're thankful for Aaron Rodgers' future career as a full-time insurance salesman.
9. We're thankful for classy Blackhawks fans not being sketchy helmet thieves.
10. We're thankful for Winter, for restoring our guilt over frolicking outside during our six months of non-Winter.
11. We're thankful for Blockbuster video; looks like we finally have a winner in the war between Blockbuster and Sean Cooley’s $27.99 in Flubber late-fees.
12. We're thankful for Jon Stewart, for eating his words as well as a Lou Malnati's pie. We take back the harsh words... we were upset.
13. We're thankful for Wrigley Field, for going on 100yrs of “just happy to be here”.
14. We’re thankful for cronuts, for having shown us that the human race is still evolving.