32. "UGH, there are too many White Castle sliders in this Bloody Mary."
33. "Why doesn’t anyone party on St. Patrick’s Day here?"
34. "This trip to the Hammond casino is in no way depressing."
35. "No, thank you, my trainer said I can’t have that."
36. "Yeah, just park wherever. You won’t get a ticket."
37. "I’d rather shop at Jewel."
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Jay Gentile is Thrillist's Chicago Editor and resident documentarian of things people have never said. Follow him @ThrillistChi.