Normally you make great life choices: you spring for extra bacon, you know your "L" stop's quickest exit, and you pick the exact bar where the tamale guy shows up. But occasionally you're not at your finest, and you make one of these 27 worst possible Chicago decisions ever:
1. Falling asleep while riding the "L"
Next stop: someone yelling you awake.
2. Asking for a "chocolate shake" at The Wieners Circle
It’s not what you think it is, unless you're thinking of char dog-quality boobs.
3. Coming into contact with Chicago River water
It doesn't matter how convincing your buddies are post-Lollapalooza.