The ultimate Denver guide to entertaining troublesome visitors

Published On 07/26/2013 Published On 07/26/2013
Dinosaur Ridge -- Denver

Out of town guests are always so demanding, always saying they wanna go somewhere fun, but then that they don't want to explore the worlds of Assassins Creed 3?! Worry not, as we've got 15 foolproof activities that both you and your potential guests will all enjoy, including your sister and her three-year-old son, your grandparents, and your former fraternity brother who can't drink anymore

THE GUESTS: YOUR SISTER AND HER THREE-YEAR-OLD KID Being an uncle is not the easiest thing in the world, as it makes texting that girl you met at Ginn Mill difficult when a kid and his disappointed mom are constantly begging for attention. Entertaining them both just got a lot easier with these picks

The Cherry Cricket, 2641 E 2nd Ave; Cherry Creek; 303.322.7666 Park the rugrat at a table at Cherry Creek's bustling pub, and get them a kid's size version of the Cricket's legendary burger and fries; get yourself one of their 23 beers on tap.

Denver Museum of Nature and Science, 2001 Colorado Blvd; City Park; 303.370.6000
A giant IMAX screen is one of many attractions -- including mummies, dinosaurs, and an extensive planetarium -- that're perfect for young, budding nerds, and older ones, too.

Children's Museum of Denver, 2121 Children's Museum Dr; Jefferson Park; 303.433.7444
The kid can actually stimulate his or her brain here, rather than just your bank account. And, with exhibits like one where you “shoot rockets with new vertical launchers”, it'll be hella fun for you, too.

Downtown Aquarium, 700 Water St; Jefferson Park; 303.561.4450
Countless fish and more than a million gallons of water will amaze the kid, while the hot mermaid ladies swimming in the tanks will be fun for you to watch.

Dinosaur Ridge , 16831 W Alameda Pkwy; Morrison; 303.697.3466
With 300 unique dinosaur tracks dating back almost 68mil years, this short, mile-and-a-half long trail guarantees that, afterwards, the kid will want to watch Jurassic Park with you.

It's tough to entertain Gramps and Grams around Denver, and not just because it's tough to squeeze in activities between naps. Here's where you should take them.

Denver Mint, 320 West Colfax Ave; Golden Triangle; 303.405.4761
The Denver Mint is the single largest producer of coins in the world, with millions of coins being produced each day, most of which end up in your couch. Tours are free but require a reservation.

Denver Art Museum, 100 W 14th Ave Pkwy; Auraria; 720.865.5000
With over 68,000 masterpieces from artists such as Pablo Picasso, Georgia O’ Keeffe, Claude Monet, and Man Ray (the most badass name of the group), you'll all enjoy the art, though you'll be the only one who can actually see it.

Molly Brown House Museum, 1340 Pennsylvania St; Capitol Hill; 303.832.4092
Your grandparents will enjoy a look into the 20th century, as the famous Titanic survivor's house has Cribs-worthy features like gold-plated walls and a polar bear rug.

Forney Museum of Transportation, 4303 Brighton Blvd; Five Points; 303.297.1113
A gearhead's dream, not only does FTM have 650+ cars, planes, and trains from as far back as the early 20th century, it also has carriages, buggies, and other vehicles grandpa used to take for joyrides.

Denver Botanic Gardens, 1007 York St; Congress Park; 720.865.3500
Like a Garden of Eden in the middle of Denver, the York St Gardens offer something everyone can appreciate, like tranquility and peace of mind. Plus, flowers!!!

Just because your bro can't drink anymore doesn't mean he can't still act a fool, and it'll be easy for him to do so at these spots:

Clear Creek Rafting, 1896 Stanley Rd; Idaho Springs; 970.372.2870
Even the easier rapids on Clear Creek have seemingly Korn-inspired names like Hell’s Corner and Rigor Mortis. Liquid Descent Rafting will hook you up with a fun-as-hell trip.

Wings Over the Rockies Air and Space Museum, 7711 E Academy Blvd #1; 303.360.5360
They have a scale model of the X-wing! Case closed.

Brainard Lake Recreation Area, Brainard Lake Rd; Ward; 303.541.2500
Drive a measly hour for the hiking trails near Brainard Lake just North of Ned, where the fresh air and rugged mountains are a nice substitute for those blue, aluminum mountains in your fridge back home.

Unser Racing, 7300 Broadway; 720.282.5000
Strap up and hit that quarter-mile track, where anyone can be a menace, and only p**sies hit the brakes.

Comedy Works, 1226 15th St; 303.595.3637
With big name comedians like Mike Birbiglia and local hero Josh Blue dropping in, this place is well-worth the ticket price, and they have a two-drink minimum that can include sodas. 

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1. The Cherry Cricket 2641 E 2nd Ave, Denver, CO 80206 (Cherry Creek)

Backed by 50 years of burger history, Cherry Cricket's patties are a true legend, and its wings, sandwiches, and chilis are pretty damn good too. A champion of local beer, the bar is stocked with 27 taps of locally brewed craft beer.

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2. Denver Museum of Nature and Science 2001 Colorado Blvd, Denver, CO 80205 (City Park)

If Space Odyssey isn't your thing (you're weird), than head to the IMAX or their planetarium and indulge in some serious nerd-point-enhancing activities.

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3. Children's Museum of Denver 2121 Childrens Museum Dr, Denver, CO 80211 (Jefferson Park)

This museum is basically just a big play pen of stuff you used to be enamored with. If your company is under the age of ten, they will likely not be speaking to you all day, purely out of amazement (bubbles! kinetics!) and sheer distraction from the fact that you are a boring adult.

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4. Denver Aquarium 700 Water St, Denver, CO 80211 (Jefferson Park)

This aquarium is known to have a mermaid show -- like, a live show that you'll actually enjoy (read: girls in swimsuits and sparkly tails floating around delicately). It's also known to be an awesome place for your inner-child, with awesome underwater exhibits and activities.

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5. Dinosaur Ridge 16831 W Alameda Pkwy, Morrison, CO 80465

Not only are there 150 million-year-old dino bones encased here, but you can even participate in a dig of your own. DR boasts hiking trails, endless activities, and extensive knowledge about every five-year-olds only passion: T-Rex.

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6. United States Mint 320 W Colfax Ave, Denver, CO 80204 (Golden Triangle)

As the nation's sole manufacturer of legal tender coinage, this unique tourist-spot is bound to have lots of shiny things you'll want to touch and play with (with historical value, of course).

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7. Denver Art Museum 100 W 14th Ave Pkwy, Denver, CO 80204 (Auraria)

With an endless list of collections and an ever-changing unique exhibit list, the DAM is a great place to get in touch with your cultural side during the weekends.

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8. Molly Brown House 1340 Pennsylvania St, Denver, CO 80203 (Capitol Hill)

You obviously have to check out one of the most visited historic sites in the state of Colorado; the MBH is a great place to take a day off (literally, just the day) from drinking and learn more about the land you're standing on.

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9. Forney Museum of Transportation 4303 Brighton Blvd, Denver, CO 80216 (Five Points)

With over 500 transportation-related exhibits, Forney's educating you on the history of wheeled vehicles be they antique cars, motorcycles, buggies, or bikes.

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10. Denver Botanic Gardens 1007 York St, Denver, CO 80206 (Congress Park)

Sitting on a luscious 24 acres of gorgeous gardens and plant life, DBG aims to educate and conserve the natural habitats and wildlife of the area.

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11. Wings Over The Rockies Air & Space Museum 7711 E Academy Blvd, Denver, CO 80230

The Air & Space Museum aims to educate visitors on the history of aviation -- of both the air and space varieties -- from both past and present.

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12. Unser Racing 7300 Broadway, Denver, CO 80221

Head to Unser where you can "arrive and drive" given that they've got more than 84 heats running a day, so you'll never have to wait too long to fulfill your need for speed on their tracks.

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13. Comedy Works 1226 15th St, Denver, CO 80202 (Lodo)

CW is in the top five best comedy clubs across the good ol' USofA (as voted by USA Today), which means it's seen some of the greats like Jay Leno, Chris Rock, Dave Chappelle, Seinfeld, and more.



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