12. Throwing up at Double Down Saloon
Sure, you can’t always help it, but if you don’t buy the punk bar’s puke insurance, you’re going to clean it up yourself. Frankly, this should be instituted at all bars. But really, don’t do it here.
13. Drinking more than three Fink Bombs at Frankie’s Tiki Room
Serious booze, serious sugar. At Frankie’s the drinks are rated on a one-to-five skull alcohol scale. Fink Bombs are five skulls. And since it’s a Tiki drink, you won’t really know you’ve been drinking hard until you get up to go to the bathroom and forget your own name. Unless you’re 300+ pounds, stick to around three Bombs, and still drink plenty of water.
14. Wearing an MMA-related T-shirt
People here will be hard on you. You won’t get into a good club, even if you (stupidly) paid more for this T-shirt than one with a collar and buttons. Drunk guys fresh out of the Friday night fights will want to scuffle. And you’re just going to get called names everywhere you go. Doesn’t matter if you’re a skinny IT guy from Toledo. Leave it at home.
15. Thinking you’re going to get a squat rack at Las Vegas Athletic Club for the first two months after New Year's
For some reason, the New-Year’s-resolutions people always pick LVAC. You can tell because the true meat heads are always super-hostile until about Valentine’s Day. Time to be the guy who works out at 11pm.