Animals: apparently not our friends

To maintain their sanity, men preoccupied with important doings must spend their downtime engaged in frivolous activities, like taking improv comedy classes, or running Italy. Or starting a blog that will make people pee their pants in fear, like Nature Wants to Eat You.

Maintained by a full-time cancer researcher who also writes stories for august scientific journals, NWEY is an ongoing compendium of ferocious creatures caught at their most terrifying, augmented by factoids written so whimsically you'll start thinking science might actually be fun, at least until someone comes and tests you on it. Meet your new nightmares:

Lepidonotopodium: Though here it's clearly hungry for Falcon, NWEY says this worm that lives in hot deep sea vents off the western coast of Canada typically "feeds on hope bacteria and other microbes".

Leopard Seal: "Oh look, a seal! Seals are cuddly! It's a cuddly flaying!" Eek.

Black Mamba: Always a stickler for accurate taxology, NWEY argues that "the black mamba is actually a light grey, so why is it called the bla… OH GOD CLOSE THE MOUTH CLOSE THE MOUTH." Oh well -- like in Italy, it looks like it'll be up to the next guy to clean up the mess.