Living in Minneapolis is a great start, and so is loving these 25 things, but it turns out that if you really wanna be able to claim the Erotic City as yours, you've gotta do these 26 things first...
1. Choose the correct side of the river
You can't be a Minneapolitan if you live in St. Paul.
2. Drink the Twins Kool-Aid
No matter how bad the team, you're not worth your hipster salt without an unflinching, TC hat-wearing allegiance to the Twinkies.
3. Own a bike with fewer than two gears
Curse yourself for doing so every time you ride it in this surprisingly hilly city.
4. Buy a fat tire bike
Proceed to never actually ride it in winter, but sometimes obnoxiously, and for no good reason on a bike path during the summer.
5. Lament the loss of the Uptown Bar & Cafe
Then go shopping at the glorious Apple Store that now stands in its place.