Hey, champ! We’re not sure exactly what happened between the French settlers and the opening of third-wave coffee shops, but somewhere along the way, we figured out what should NOT be done in Montreal. You’ve been warned.
1. Going out because you really want to dance
This city, weirdly, has no dancing bars -- at least not for anyone not over 23 years old. Unless you feel like going to a club or concert, stay home. A kitchen floor is your best bet.