Nashville has seen an overwhelming influx of people moving here from all over the country, all of whom are eager to take a bar crawl down Lower Broad and immediately declare themselves a local. Not so fast there, cowboy. There are, in fact, a few more things you must check off the list before you can officially call yourself a Nashvillian. To wit:
1. Burn your mouth eating Nashville hot chicken. At least twice.
You think "Maybe this hot chicken is a little milder. Maybe this time my mouth won’t feel like it took a trip to the Third Circle of fiery Hell." You were wrong.
2. Replace “you all” or “you guys” in your vocabulary with “y’all”
You know that look a dog gives you when it doesn't understand something? That's how people will look at you if you don't do this.
4. Have at least one Hatch Show print hanging somewhere in your house
Or at least have one rolled up and stored in a safe place. A Spirit of Nashville poster is also acceptable.
5. Take the wrong split on the interstate and drive around the entire city... multiple times
Don’t feel too bad about it though. Nashville is one of the rare cities in the country that has six major interstates crossing through it.
6. Have a serious conversation about the ridiculous housing prices in Nashville right now
This conversation is likely to also consist of a long rant about how much you hate those tall, skinny, over-priced houses popping up throughout the city.
7. Instagram a picture of your $8 grilled cheese sandwich
Ya know, the one you waited in line for 45 minutes to get.
8. Watch Nashville solely to see someone you know walk past the screen as an extra
It’s also possible you are that extra.
9. Finally understand that contrary to popular belief, Nashville has more hipsters than cowboys
In fact, we don’t really have any cowboys...
10. Learn to avoid Broadway like the plague
Unless you're part of a bachelorette party. Then, apparently, it's illegal for you not to go.
11. Wave at strangers
That guy on your street who’s always sitting on his front porch, the cross-walk lady who blows her whistle at you if you’re going too fast in a school zone, that co-worker whose name you can’t seem to remember but who you often run into at the market. Don’t be rude; just wave. And yes, this also includes your friendly neighborhood Contributor seller.
12. Complain that it’s WAY too cold outside
And then a week later complain that it's WAY too hot outside.
13. Agree with someone that Nashville needs better public transportation
You know, because the traffic in Nashville is terrible. Seriously, how is it this bad?!
14. Drink sweet tea on a semi-regular basis
Because it’s cold and sugary and delicious. Enough said.
15. Go to at least one Predators game
Because no one actually wants to go to a Titans game and you have to get your sports fix from somewhere.
16. Wait in line for hours to get pancakes at the Pancake Pantry
And realized that it was mostly tourists in line with you.
17. Have a visitor from out of town drag you to the Country Music Hall of Fame & Loveless Cafe
Hey, at least you got a delicious biscuit out of the deal.
18. Forget about getting in/out of East Nashville if anything is happening at LP Field
You’ll have to face the fact that you’re trapped on one side of the river or the other. Accept that this is your life now.
19. Locally source all of your coffee & beer needs
Because Nashville has a plethora of amazing breweries and coffee shops that you should be visiting on a regular basis. It's one thing the hipsters do right.
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