As a rational human being, you probably already despise Johnny Manziel. But why stop there? Now that he’s run, thrown, and autographed Texas A&M into the national spotlight, you’ve got a whole university to intensely dislike. From our Austin edition, here’s a primer on why hating the Aggies is totally justified, and fun. (Editor's Note: the author of this post fully admits that Texas hasn't won a national championship since 1970, and that Vince Young hasn't won a national championship since 2005, and that maybe frustration had something to do with this.)
1. They have so much school spirit it’s terrifying A&M doesn’t have freshman orientation. They have a cult indoctrination period known as “Fish Camp” that involves bussing thousands of impressionable teenagers and 900 counselors to an even crappier town than College Station so they can spend four days (four days!) learning fight songs in an auditorium and then finger-blasting each other in an allegedly air-conditioned cabin. If David Koresh had been interested in Agricultural and Mechanical, he would have matriculated here.