I Can't Stop Watching This Video of a Woman Cutting Open Boss Baby's Belly
For the last two weekends, The Boss Baby, animated comedy about a temperamental infant voiced by Alec Baldwin, has been the number one movie in America, grossing over $90 million dollars. While some have interpreted the film as a treaty on life under President Donald Trump, many fans are just excited to play with the wide range of toys and promotional items that accompany your average cartoon blockbuster. But one woman, a prolific YouTube user that goes by the name the "Toy Genie," is so psyched, she's cutting open the Boss Baby's belly with a knife. With glee.
In a video titled "Cutting Open Boss Baby What's Inside His Belly," the baby-voiced narrator-surgeon behind popular YouTube clips like "Cutting Open Hulk Exploding Belly What's Inside" and "Cutting Open Trolls Guy Diamond's Belly What's Inside" uses a scalpel to cut inside a figure of the diaper-wearing CEO. What happens when she slices open his stomach? She finds a mysterious black goo that wouldn't look out of place in an X-Files episode. It's like the chestburster scene from Alien re-staged for toddlers. "Boss Baby's belly keeps oozing so much of this slime," coos the narrator at one point.

If that's not unnerving enough, the Toy Genie kicks the body horror to another level by sticking her gloved hand inside the stomach of the Boss Baby and removing a series of items in a whimsical autopsy. (How these items ended up inside his body goes unexplored.) The premise stated in the video is that The Boss Baby "has a tummy ache," framing this video as a humane act, but I'm not buying it. This is clearly an organ harvesting situation.
Here's an incomplete list of the items the Toy Genie pulls from the Boss Baby's innards: a stack of fake money, a Boss Baby branded toy bottle, a pacifier, a Smurf action figure, a diaper, a Trolls "Blind Bag," some Legos, a PJ Masks figurine, a Minecraft toy, a Forever Puppy, and two plush versions of the Boss Baby, which suggests that The Boss Baby has been consuming his own clones. There's clearly a metaphor here: perhaps, much like capitalism, The Boss Baby only survives by eating itself? Maybe we're all trapped inside the belly of a Boss Baby? Is life simply a black goo we're all seeking to escape from?

I'm not sure, but I do know that the internet is a wild place. When I woke up this morning, I was aware that unboxing videos were a popular and potentially lucrative fiefdom of the internet, but I had no idea there were lengthy videos of adults cutting into bellies and pulling toys from a black abyss. More importantly, I didn't realize I'd be so fascinated by these videos: they're like David Cronenberg meets Teletubbies. Now that I know this video and other like it exist, I'm forever changed. That's the power of The Boss Baby.
Sign up here for our daily Thrillist email, and get your fix of the best in food/drink/fun.