A day dedicated to dads means more than a sad tie, card, or perfunctory phone call. Father’s Day means giving pops the dap he deserves. Not only did this guy give you life, he probably dealt with a lot of your nonsense for decades. So celebrate your dad with these simple and not-so-simple things you should definitely do for him.
1. Turn off the damn kitchen light
He’s not Con Edison/made of money/running a 7-11 here!
And not for money, because of threats, or thanks to passive aggressive notes on the fridge (actually more of a mom move anyway). No, you should mow the lawn out of the goodness of your heart and because dad’s been asking you to do it for, oh, about 30 years now.
This Father’s Day, get your old man what he actually wants: to get sauced. With Applewood Bacon-crusted Glaze, that is. Bring your dads to TGI Fridays, and choose 3 of their 5 handcrafted varieties of slow-cooked, fall-off-the-bone baby back pork ribs -- plus, whatever else you guys are craving. And to wash it down, sip on TGIF’s Happy Hour Every Hour, and have happy hour prices whenever you guys decide. Yeah, really.
Golf? H.O.R.S.E? Whatever minor to major physical activity is still within dad’s ability, let him beat you in something. If he still does this regularly anyway with you trying your hardest… damn dude, your dad is way better than you.
Or the place with that guy. Regardless, you’ve heard it 1,000 times and started rolling your eyes on the second rendition. But it’s dad’s favorite story for a reason -- sit there and listen like you’ve never heard it before.
You’ve probably spent years trying to change his mind about something he vehemently refuses to reconsider. Just take a day to put yourself in his dad shoes and see what he’s thinking. And if you followed this list, it’s “Damn, what an awesome son/daughter/adopted neighborhood ragamuffin.”