After a brief story about Prince's former protégés ("His appetite for beautiful women seemed insatiable!"), attention turns to a woman who looks like Ted Cruz. "No, this is not Senator Ted Cruz dressed in drag," the anchor tells us -- it is, rather, a sad woman from Mississippi who was first discovered on Maury trying to find the father of her child. Talking via Skype, she tells Inside Edition that she sees no resemblance between Cruz and herself; nevertheless, she says she'd like to meet him in person, despite the fact that she had never heard of him before she went viral.
Meanwhile, the Live! With Kelly and Michael drama heats up. Some speculate that Kelly may never return! And Suzanne Somers tells Inside Edition EXCLUSIVELY whom she wants to play her in the Three's Company movie! (Turns out it's her own 20-year-old granddaughter. Small world!)
Diane turns her enormous, shit-eating grin off, a complete 180, changing her attitude from bubbly and excitable to respectful and pained. I refuse to believe that anyone can be upset with that much lip gloss on. "We'll leave you with this," she says, "an incredible scene in Downtown Minneapolis." Footage of people holding their cellphones aloft and nodding in time to "Purple Rain" plays over the credits. Said footage is grainy and nearly unwatchable.