So there: mystery solved. Now we can all get back to talking about the important issues, like Donald Trump's hair, Rand Paul's justice fetish, and Jeb Bush's expensive weed habit.
Sign up here for our daily Thrillist email, and get your fix of the best in food/drink/fun.
Gianni Jaccoma is a staff writer for Thrillist, and he can't fathom taking these debates seriously. Follow his sardonic tweets @gjaccoma, and send your news tips to firstname.lastname@example.org