Staffer: Brett Williams
It was around 2003 and I was a middle-schooler in the greater Cleveland area, so of course I was all about LeBron James. Only later, when I started taking French, I found out not only did I spell the name differently than LeBron—I was using the feminine article. It was too late to change so I swallowed my pride and kept IMing the ladies on dial-up like a madman."
Staffer: Jeremy Glass
"This was my screen name when I was, surprise, 12 years old. I had a seriously unhealthy obsession with Andy Kaufman at the time and wanted to show the world how I felt. It was more than the "Man on the Moon" movie, I literally thought I was the reincarnation of the guy. I wonder if he's actually dead..."
Staffer: Matt Meltzer
"When I was in High School I tried to prove I was some kind of badass by telling people, 'I'm a Beast, I don't feel pain,' then letting them punch me in the stomach, spray me with pepper spray and generally do stuff to me that Johnny Knoxville later went on to make millions of dollars letting people do to him. So my nickname became 'Beast.' I also had this strange infatuation with Spanish because I thought Miami was, like, the coolest place ever (I later learned it's not) so I decided instead of calling myself 'TheBeast1995', I'd give it a little Latin flair and make myself look like a Cuban tough guy from Miami. In the true spirit of AOL chatrooms, however, I was in fact a white kid from Seattle who played tuba in the marching band."