With so many new shows to stuff into your eyeballs this year -- not to mention catching up on a bunch of old ones -- you may be continually baffled about when and where the next big TV thing is dropping. Fear not: Just bookmark our ridiculously comprehensive, passionately curated, and always updated guide to the premiere dates of new and returning shows arriving on the small screen in 2017.

The Americans | FX

March 5

FEUD: Bette and Joan (FX)
Ryan Murphy (AHS) sets his talents on the Old Hollywood rivalry between Joan Crawford and Bette Davis (Jessica Lange and Susan Sarandon).

The Last Man on Earth (FOX)
Will Forte's delightfully weird post-apocalyptic comedy returns after a short break to continue its third season.

March 7

The Americans (FX)
Season 5 of the spy drama will pick up in the wake of the Cold War catastrophe we glimpsed in last year's finale.

Trial & Error (NBC)
John Lithgow plays an eccentric poetry professor who's been accused of murdering his wife.

March 10

Burning Sands (Netflix)
A top fraternity pledge considers speaking out against his college's violent hazing rituals.

Love (Netflix)
Season 2 of Gillian Jacobs and Paul Rust's quirky LA love story drops in full.

March 12

American Crime (ABC)
The third season of this anthology drama will take place in North Carolina, and will focus on issues like immigration, addiction, and workers rights. Felicity Huffman, Regina King, and Timothy Hutton return in new roles.  

March 15

Hap and Leonard: Mucho Mojo (Sundance)
Season 2 of James Purefoy and Michael K. Williams's series finds them in mucho trouble.

March 16

Review (Comedy Central)
The final season premiere of a show that reviews life experiences ranging from pillow fights to killing a person. 

March 17

Iron Fist (Netflix)
Danny Rand (Finn Jones, aka Loras from Game of Thrones) and his supercharged punches want you to know 2017 won't be without appetizing Marvel fare.

March 22

Shots Fired (FOX)
FOX tries its hand at the socially conscious drama game with this 10-part series about racially charged police shootings. 

Empire (FOX)
The recording-industry melodrama kicks off its third season, which will probably feature Terrence Howard and Taraji P. Henson fighting.

Archer | FX

April 4

iZombie (The CW)
The undead Liv Moore continues to unravel Seattle's zombie conspiracy in Rob Thomas' rom-zom caper.

April 5

Archer (FXX)
Sterling Malory Archer's eighth season takes us to a Los Angeles crime ring in 1947.

April 7

American Playboy: The Hugh Hefner Story (Amazon)
This is a 13-episode documentary about Hugh Hefner. You probably already know if you'll like it or not.

April 8

The Son (AMC)
Pierce Brosnan as the cranky, villainous, racist patriarch of a Texas clan in the early 20th century? Yes, please.

April 10

Better Call Saul (AMC)
The Breaking Bad prequel returns for its third season, with Bob Odenkirk continuing his outstanding work as a weaselly lawyer with no aversion to criminal clients.

April 11

Brooklyn Nine-Nine (FOX)
Cops! Brooklyn! Andy Samberg! Laughs! The fourth season continues.

April 14

Mystery Science Theater 3000 (Netflix)
The classic TV show returns to skewer the bad movies of the world. There's a new host, but robots will still be on hand for mechanized quips.

April 15 

Doctor Who (BBC America)
It's the final season with Peter Capaldi as the titular doctor, but a show that got its start in 1963 will likely figure out a way to press on.

April 16

The Leftovers (HBO)
Our favorite show of 2015 finally returns for its third (and, sadly, final) season.

Veep (HBO)
Selina Meyer's snafus may appear downright quaint compared to the current political reality, but Veep has shown time and time again that it offers some of the smartest (and funniest) writing on television.

April 19

Fargo (FX)
Will there be aliens on the third season of FX's bloody anthology adaptation of the Coen brothers' classic? Guess you'll have to watch to find out. 

April 23

Silicon Valley (HBO)
Come for the sick burns or Jared's insanity, stay for Mike Judge's light ribbing of America's current ruling class: tech entrepreneurs.

April 25

Great News (NBC)
What if your mom were your intern? Thanks to Tina Fey and her wisecracking production collaborators, we're about to find out.

Genius (NatGeo)
It's NatGeo's first scripted series, and it's about Einstein. Albert, that is. 

April 26

Gomorrah (Sundance)
The Sopranos-esque Italian crime drama returns to the States for Season 2.

The Handmaid's Tale (Hulu)
The small-screen adaptation of Margaret Atwood's dystopian drama you've been waiting for, starring Elisabeth Moss as a woman out to locate her missing daughter.

April 30

American Gods (Starz)
The cult favorite from writer Neil Gaiman sets up a host of modern gods -- one of whom is Deadwood's Ian McShane -- for an epic battle.

April TBA

El Chapo (Univision) 
Just in time for his real-world extradition, Univision and Netflix are teaming up to tell the notorious cartel leader's life story.

Twin Peaks | Showtime

May 5

Sense8 (Netflix)
The absolutely mental saga picks up with the Sensates still on the run from the adorably terrifying Mr. Whispers.

May 12

I Love Dick (Amazon)
Transparent creator Jill Soloway adapts the provocatively titled memoir/novel by Chris Kraus in the former's second Amazon original series. 

May 21

Twin Peaks (Showtime)
It's baaaaack. And we're exciiiiiited.

May 30

House of Cards (Netflix)
Find out what the Underwoods have to say about their own fractured political landscape.

June 9

Orange Is the New Black (Netflix)
It's the fifth season -- are they ever going to get out of this prison?!

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