The question of penis size has haunted men throughout time, giving rise to countless adolescent fears that develop into full-blown neuroses once adulthood rolls around. Fortunately, a new study has approached this burning issue from a new angle, using science to get to the root of the problem -- by which we mean it used 3D-printed penises.
Conducted by researchers from UCLA and the University of New Mexico, the peer-reviewed study asked 75 women to choose two perfect dicks from 33 different test penises: one for a long-term partner, and one for a one-night-stand. The faux hogs were printed in a variety of shapes and sizes, although only one color was used (blue) in order to minimize racial bias.
The results should make most men a bit more comfortable in their own shoes (or shorts): the ideal penis for a long-term partner measures 6.3 inches long, and 4.8 inches around, while the ideal one-night-stand measures only slightly larger at 6.4 inches long, and 5 inches around.