"The suspect wore dark sunglasses, " The Post went on, "tight black gloves and a Yankees baseball cap — plus a really cheesy fake mustache to match his apparent wig."
The article also mentions a pair of other robberies that are related only because the robbers wore funny costumes: one in which the suspect was described as being "dressed like a construction worker" and another was said to be wearing a "camouflage bucket hat". Because why not.
This should all come as a fair warning to anyone looking to rob a bank in New York. First, if you're going to wear a disguise looking like Keith Hernandez, remember that he played for the Mets, not the Yankees. Second, if you're going to look ridiculous (we're assuming the camouflage bucket hat was also absurd looking) while robbing a bank, just know that you'll be the focal point of some major shade throwing by The Post. And then you'll probably go to jail while we laugh at you.
Never change, New York Post.
Pete Dombrosky is an Editorial Assistant for Thrillist and he thought he saw the robber this morning, but it turns out it was just Tom Selleck. Check out his Twitter for much more hard crime drama.