Everyone knows that Portland is home to more strip clubs per capita than any other city in the world. And everyone knows that PDX is also home to some of the strangest strip clubs in the world. But strangely, the sheer number of adult destinations means that not everyone knows which place to hit for a great steak, old-school video games, or just the... um, Girls! Girls! Girls! Don't worry, we've got the definitive list right here:
Most Famous Vegan Stripclub
Casa Diablo, NW Industrial
Sure you've heard about the (ironically?) flesh-less menu, the trouble with the Secret Service, and the features in high brow publications, but what's it actually like? Well, the topless bartenders only give change in two dollar bills, the minimum required tip for the dancers who freely walk around the large, open, somewhat well-lit room and interact with customers. Turns out, the extra dollar buys a lot.
Steak and Strippers, Need Anything Else?
Acropolis Steakhouse, Sellwood/Moreland
The first of such establishments to serve good food, or at least advertise it, this place is almost-as-well-known for an amazing Sunday brunch and its sweet steaks as it is for... well, boobs.
Sassy’s Bar, East Portland
With its three stages, dizzying assortment of "entertainers", and presumably a scheduling whiz in the back who manages to keep the latter in constant rotation on the former, it seems churlish to complain that this mainstay can get a little crowded on busy night. So, keep your mouth shut and just head over to the nearby Union Jacks if you have to.
Mary’s Club, Downtown
There’s nothing particularly great about Mary's -- the girls are friendly but nonchalant, it's usually slow -- but it does have a glorious flashing sign that welcomes you to Downtown. And because it's been open for almost a half century -- first offering exotic, and then topless dancing, before going all the way -- it is literally a part of Portland's past we should all cherish, or would if we weren't distracted by those nonchalantly nude girls.
Party Like (And Maybe With) A Rockstar
Union Jacks Club, East Burnside
The moody flashing lights, the leather seats, and its proximity to the Jupiter, make this place feel almost like an upscale lounge, but the speed at which that girl drinks the gin and lemonade you just bought her, coupled with the crippling $4.50 ATM fee (wtf!?), kinda make this place feel like... well, like a strip club.
Lucky Devil Lounge, South East
You gotta love a club that takes themes so seriously it's willing to render totally attractive, naked women utterly unsexy via over-the-top make-up, costumes, etc. Or not, since you're there to see totally attractive, naked women!
Club With Most Distractions
Dv8 Gentleman's Club, South East
No lovely, scantily clad lady, I don't want a lap dance, I'm too busy playing pool, and right after that I'm gonna hit up that PACMAN cocktail table, and watch the Blazers lose on one of the big flatscreen TVs... err, what am I saying? Of course I want a lap dance!
The Only One Open After Bars Close
Golden Dragon Exotic Club, Downtown
The Golden Dragon doesn't serve alcohol (Booooo!), but that means they can stay open 'til 4a (Yaaaaaaaayyy!), and let in people under 21... but who cares about that, did you hear they're open 'til 4a?!
1. Casa Diablo2839 NW St Helens Rd, Portland
2. Sassy's Bar927 SE Morrison Bridge, Portland
3. Golden Dragon Exotic Club324 SW 3rd Ave, Portland
4. Mary's Club129 SW Broadway, Portland
5. Union Jacks Club938 E Burnside St, Portland
6. Lucky Devil Lounge633 SE Powell Blvd, Portland
7. Dv85021 SE Powell Blvd, Portland
8. Acropolis Steakhouse8325 SE McLoughlin Blvd, Portland
Casa Diablo isn't your typical restaurant from the outside, or, for that matter, the inside. It's modeled after the vampire bar in From Dusk Til Dawn and features a solid vegan menu with must-tries like soy stroganoff. Not what you were expecting? There's another surprise: this spot is actually a strip club that has a bank full of those ever-popular $2 bills for tipping and dancers performing the wildest leather-free strip show you’ll ever see. That's right: this is a vegan strip club. Bless you, Portland.
Three stages. A rotating and diverse selection of lovely ladies. What more could you want from this East Portland temple of tail?
Portland's classiest most...exotic... joint to-date. There's a jukebox, full bar, chinese buffet options, and...oh yeah...female barely-dressed dancers.
Operating for almost 50yrs, Mary's Club is perhaps the original Portland bastion of boob-baring. Stop in for a drink at this iconic PDX club.
Open 365 days a year, Union Jacks Club brings ladies and top shelf booze together in one fell swoop to single-handedly rid your wallet of singles.
Inspired by a 1960s Playboy vibe, Lucky Devil Lounge brings wild themes to their velvet-lined stages.
Pool tables and TVs adorn this Portland strippery. With happy hour specials that include $2.50 well drinks, and a promise of "just boobs, no nagging", you really can't go wrong at Dv8.