San Diego is No. 1 at these 16 things. Suck it, everywhere else.

Everyone knows that San Diego is damn near perfect; "America's Finest City", some would say. Perfect weather, beautiful people, beautiful beer that makes said people even MORE beautiful... things are good, and somehow getting even better. But there are some things San Diego especially dominates. Specifically, these 16 things, independently verified by outside sources:

Locals know that the San Diego Zoo is amazing, and apparently everyone else does too, because more than 3 million people a year are coming to check it out, making it the most visited zoo in America. Just look at that face!

Even though thanks to stuff like "methylmercury" and "bycatch" it seems like the canned tuna business is going down the drain, San Diego is still the "tuna capital of the world", with the two biggest companies in the biz. Put THAT in your tuna melt and eat it, as the saying... doesn't really go, but whatever.

Some other inferior lists have argued the contrary, but this avid beer writer clearly knows his stuff. Take that LA. And seriously, GQ, what were you thinking?

Our pro sports teams might be notoriously futile when it comes to actually bringing home championships, but at least we’re the best at it. And at least we have the best beer with which to drown our sorrows.

Breathe easy San Diegans, because this is the cleanest our air has been in 58 years.

We’re not just killing it when it comes to improving our air quality; thanks to our awesome weather, we’re also dominating at ending global warming, due to our comparatively low energy usage.

Small businesses are on the rise all over the nation, and according to a whole bunch of data collected from 27 million businesses, this is the best place for a little startup of your own. You're welcome, future titans of industry.

Considering that we have several Marine and Naval bases, plus more than 58,000 veterans and military family members living in and around San Diego, it's no surprise we're spending plenty of that government cash.

Sure, even locals were really surprised about this one. But we'll take it! And it's hilarious watching Chicago and New York flip out about it.

Suck it, Harvard. Eat it, Yale. Nobody ever liked you anyway, Princeton. UCSD is where it's at! Fine, the ranking's a few years old... but we can coast off of it for at least a few more.

Sure, this one is sort of self-proclaimed, but we’ve been calling ourselves "America’s Finest City" since the Republican Convention of 1972, and if you say something enough, it basically becomes true, right?

Thanks to our perfect climate and weather, crops are growing in San Diego year-round -- but we're even better when it comes to growing all the pretty flowers, so that local guys can still forget to procure them for anniversaries and other important occasions.

Construction is currently underway for the largest desalination plant in the Western Hemisphere. Once completed in 2016, it will be pumping out 50 million gallons of drinking water a day. What drought?

That’s right. While its technically winter and everyone else is shivering in their parkas and digging themselves out of the snow, we’re tanning on the beach and soaking up that vitamin D.

Nobody knows how to give a good rub down like we do.

We love all of our beaches, but Coronado Beach is the best in the whole country, thanks to its postcard-perfect scenery in front of the Hotel Del.

Sign up here for our daily San Diego email and be the first to get all the food/drink/fun in town.