Head down to Chinatown for a great night out
Everyone was 21 for exactly a year, and even if your glory days of dousing yourself in cologne and chugging vodka… or PBR… or Whiteclaw until you can’t see straight are over, one can always dream of that epoch in your life when hangovers were irrelevant, right? Anyways, it’s our duty to get you hip to the right places in case special circumstances require you to wander the Inner Westside while someone's fraternity brother celebrates their last night as a “free man.” Tryst is an endearingly creepy lounge with a fantastic burger, Valentine’s is a twee little indie kid bar that’s rarely packed to the brim, Shanghai Tunnel has plenty of pinball machines and cheap tallboys to kill an hour or two while your crew throws their cash around at Spyce, and the DJ scenes at Tube and Maxwell are surprisingly East Side-y despite the fact that you may have to remove your hat on the way in.
Use the term “hot tub” as a verb
As the boomer folklore goes, there was an era right around the nadir of '70’s coked out SoCal cool when hitting up other people’s hot tubs was considered a hobby of sorts. Those days have gone the way of fondue sets, pet rocks, and Walter Becker, but it’s high time the youth bring back the time-honored tradition of getting weird in a sous vide cooker of strangers' juices. If you’re a hippy who prefers to do it in the buff, you’ll love the all-inclusive experience at Everett House, which features a dry sauna, a steam room, a communal hot tub outdoors, and an unfathomable amount of body hair worn with the utmost pride. If modesty is a must, head to Montavilla for an hour at Tub and Tan, a delightful and somewhat outdated bathhouse of sorts that promises only two things: unquestioned privacy and pristine sanitary conditions.
Haters who bemoan Portland’s lack of a proper club scene have clearly never spent a night at 45 East. It’s one of the premiere stops in town for touring DJs and indie-adjacent dance acts, with artists like Toro Y Moi, A-Trak, and Travis all having spent some time on stage within the past year.